I turned 53 last week.
I am not a big birthday person in general, but it’s always nice to take a moment to reflect back on the year that was and the year to come… so I did and thought I would share a few things that came up for me.
In no particular order…
I already knew this but in reflecting back on this year I have noticed again that complexity has a habit of sneaking up on me when I am not paying attention. I have an incredibly hard time saying no to things, and often find myself overcommitted and under-resourced. One of my goals for this coming year is to simplify where I can. I think I say that every year so we’ll see…but this is the first time putting it in writing and sharing it with others so I am cautiously optimistic!
I also took a really hard look in the mirror and came to grips with the fact that I am mostly dissatisfied, and maybe even unhappy. I have a daily gratitude practice that I stick to pretty religiously, but for some reason it is not moving the needle on joy and gratitude for me. It’s odd. But a good thing to notice, think about, and work on for the coming year. Maybe I need to change it up. I recently switched from every morning to every morning and every evening… again we’ll see.
On a good note I am healthier this year than last. I completely cut out alcohol in February and cut my sugar by about 80% (it was 100% for a while, damn ice cream!). I was committed to those goals when I turned 50 but better late than never!! I am looking forward to getting back to 100% sugar free this year, and upping my fitness and movement game.
I also reflected on being a dad this past year. I will never, ever celebrate success there because as soon as you do, something will change for sure and you are back to square one. Parenting is freaking hard! But I am super proud of my kids and the young adults that are emerging, and feel good about how I show up as their dad at least 75% of the time, with the goal to always be better.
I guess the real measure of success in a year is how many people you helped, or positively impacted, and this year I feel like I came up short on this one. I went through a lot of personal change, and growth, and family stuff, and feel like maybe I wasn’t a great resource externally… but the good news is I have 364 more days to be better. If you are reading this and agree with me, I guess know that I know and I am working hard to change for the better.
Those seem to be the main themes that came up for me as I took a few quiet moments to reflect on the past year. Thanks for indulging me (if you made it this far!!).
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